Divorce doesn’t have to be ugly. Clare Pilsworth, partner of the family law department at Tees Law, explains how the right legal team can help
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Divorce is one of life’s most stressful events, right up there with buying a house. Part of the stress is that people do not expect to experience it, and often it is forced upon them. There are lots of new things to cope with – from dealing with unsettled children to making ends meet and worrying about where you may live in the future.
New legislation brought in no-fault divorce in April 2022, removing the element of blame for divorce. While some people find the lack of legal blame quite difficult, it is important because it sets the tone when resolving financial and child arrangements, creating a forward-looking approach to resolution.
Reaching a solution by avoiding court is now much more common, using approaches like mediation. The divorce process falls into three main areas: the divorce paperwork, sorting out the finances and doing what’s best for the children, which can be very emotional. Trying to fit childcare around work and school hours, perhaps different shift patterns and school holidays, across two houses in different locations can be a juggle. Finding a workable solution is paramount. Depending on the child’s age, they are likely to have their own thoughts on all of this; many parents find it helpful to take the time to consider their child’s view. The idea that the child always goes with the mother is not the case.
Myths and misconceptions
There are many common misconceptions about divorce, so it is always best to take professional advice. Tees Law has been helping people for over 100 years, holding all the information and resources you need – as well as a large team of skilled advisors to help you make the right decisions. We will help you understand your finances and treat all the information you give us with the utmost discretion.
The most pressing question asked is often: ‘Am I going to have enough money to live somewhere and pay my bills’? At Tees Law, we will take time to explain complex financial arrangements such as pensions, savings, investments, share options and deferred bonuses. There is no such thing as a silly question.
There’s often the assumption that whatever funds or assets you brought into the marriage will remain yours afterwards. In fact, the law assumes that as a married couple, you share everything, including bank and building society accounts, even
if they’re in your sole name.
A nuptial agreement can protect certain property, business interests or other assets. These agreements are becoming more common, for instance, protecting a house deposit loaned from the bank of mum and dad, or where people are entering into a marriage for the second time.
Couples can be reluctant to discuss nuptial agreements for fear of causing offence, but it’s like taking out house insurance: you assume you’re never going to have to make a claim, but you still take it out just to be on the safe side.
Some of our clients cohabit or start a family before marriage. They often have the idea that, after a certain length of time, they enjoy legal rights as ‘common law husband or wife’. In law, there’s no such thing. It is therefore important to understand your rights at the start of the relationship to make sure you can protect yourself.
